oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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