Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
