come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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