you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
