one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
