Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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