You're so nebulous sometimes
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
