she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
