whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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