Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Did we literally take a cab across the street
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
