What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
