nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
