ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
