so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
He felt like a one man threesome
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
i think i just lost a toe
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
