Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I said "one day" and that day is not today
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Randomize