On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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