just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
