There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come share oat with me in your robe
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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