It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Randomize
