whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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