I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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