I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
