everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
