You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize