Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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