Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He called his prostate his "boner button".
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
