You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
