I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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