I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
