i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Did we literally take a cab across the street
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
