Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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