I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
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The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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