She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
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