pedialite and red bull = repair kit
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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