please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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