You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
