I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
