you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.