Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
she told me i tasted like america
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
