After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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