i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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