Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
they're like a gay fantastic four
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Randomize
