Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
fuck your aforementioned shoe
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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