Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Boobs speak an international language.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
