shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
