i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
