I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
