Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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