The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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