is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize